Thursday 20 August 2020

Unintended(?) boners. in public

 


We all get hard-ons when they're not needed or especially unwanted, don't we? - most often when we were teenagers, I recall with acute embarrassment - on the bus to and from school (and always at the time when one needed to get off the bus!) Once when I was watching TV alone and, with no warning, my mum came into the room and told me to stand up, she wanting to check my height for, probably some clothes. My embarrassed attempts to stall hoping it would quickly go down were excruciating. I'm not sure if she noticed, though even now I find it agonising just to think about it. 
And once, when I bought my first leather jacket and tried it on, with the young male sales assistant standing right beside me while I was inwardly muttering with some anger "Get down! Get down!!!" 
But most spectacularly of all, I'd have been in my early 20s when I went to an army surplus store to buy some of those incredibly sexy (as I've always thought) British army khaki drill trousers with those fuckin' dirty great button-down flaps on the back pockets, regulation wear for soldiers in warm climes in the 1950s and 60s. When I went into the store it had taken me all my inner strength to have gotten the 'k' word out without stammering, while trying to hold down my cock with a hand in my side jeans pocket. And then what does the guy do, after asking me the size and fetching a pair from the pile on the shelves? He says "Try them on!" - not "Would you like to.......?" or anything like giving me the option of whether to or no, but handing them to me and indicating where I go to do the change. There were no proper changing rooms but he showed me behind some shelves and left me, my cock by now throbbing like mad and pointing straight upwards. Just when I'd got them on with great difficulty, and was doing up the buckles on the waist, he appeared from round the shelves to check for himself - and there was I, tented out conspicuously in front - no underpants, so less to hinder the 'jutting out' - and which he most definitely did notice.....and, after a moment's awkward silence, said "So you're an army guy, are you?" (was there a knowing smirk in his voice?). It only dawned on me later that what he'd probably meant was that was I into army gear, but in my state of acute befuddlement I blurted out something about - no, I wasn't in the army. After changing back into jeans I hurriedly finished the purchase and couldn't get out of the shop fast enough while looking for any suggestion of a smile on the guy's face - and I do believe there was at least the trace of one. As I left I was sure as anything that the chap was laughing at me and was bound to tell his mates, who'd all have a good laugh over their beers at the 'embarrassed young fella with a hard-on'.   

And after all these incidents of unwanted erections which I've no doubt all men have, the reverse is also true, though ever more common as we age, i.e. when we most want one we just can't seem to get it up! 😖


As for the above photo 'examples', it's hard to say whether the first one was meant or not, though I'm sure the guy himself doesn't give a flying fuck either way. The other two, both posing for photos are, I think, more likely to be 'accidental', and likewise the two sporting their hard-ons couldn't really care less. I should think that whoever it was who wanted their photo was attracted by capturing on camera those incipient erections, which probably gave 'rise' to those possessing one to stiffen up still further, as has clearly happened in the last pic. (Ha ha! But good on him for not caring!)

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